so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
