Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
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