they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
