dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
