does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
