Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
