I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
