Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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