bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
