U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
