But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
