I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I touched a dick in church today
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
