'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
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