How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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