Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
