he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
