Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
