That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
His nipple licking is glorious
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