I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
