He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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