There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
