I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
PANTIES FOUND
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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