So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
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