He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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