We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
