sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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