I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
