Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
