she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
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