whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
