You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Randomize
