So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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