1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
