Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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