Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
