I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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