umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
He did a backflip because drugs
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
