So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
