stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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