is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
