plz talk dirty to me
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
