Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Randomize
