Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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