please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
