the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
