I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
