White coat. Heels.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I want a musical about memes.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
