Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Randomize
