I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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