Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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